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Emo Couple Has One Kid; Break Up

Posted by Dylan Evans on

High-school sweethearts Dan and Sarah McAllister, who bonded over a shared interest of such bands as American Football and Cap'n Jazz have announced that once they finish their tour of Disneyworld with their child Jodie that they will be separating indefinitely.

"This started as something fun, and we always promised ourselves we'd quit while we were ahead if it ever stopped being that" cites Dan. "Suffice to say, being a parent is a full-time gig and between living costs, a lack of quality sleep and being cooped up in the same space put some serious stress on our relationship."

"It's unfortunate. I will always look over this period of my life fondly and as something that helped shape me as a person, but I think we all knew this wasn't going to last" adds Sarah. "But hey, at least we got something out of it!"

When asked for a statement, young Jodie McAllister remained hopeful for an eventual reconciliation between her parents, as well as the idea of having a younger sibling many years later when they're no longer relevant.

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